New York Yankees Sign San Francisco's C.F. Wall To Undisclosed Deal

NEW YORK (AP) - The New York Yankees, despondent over their early exit from the 2010 MLB Playoffs, have made a bold move to begin their off season, signing the centerfield wall of the San Francisco Giants' AT&T Park yesterday. The terms of the deal were undisclosed, as San Francisco's Wall is still in post season play.

C.F. Wall makes a game saving play
against Texas 2B Ian Kinsler in the
fifth inning of Thursday's Game 2.

Wall, fresh off denying Ian Kinsler a homerun in Game 2 of the World Series, was praised by Yankees General Manager Brian Cashman as being a veteran presence in the outfield, citing it's 10 years of outfield experience that instantly puts it second to only Lance Berkman on the Yankees active roster of players who have spent time in the outfield.

At 8' tall, Wall would also become the tallest player ever to don Yankee pinstripes. His playing weight of 2.8 tons would put him second only to Cecil Fielder. Wall stands on the verge of greatness as the Giants are leading the World Series 2-1 over the Texas Rangers. Wall almost had a ring in 2002, but the Giants fell victim to the Anaheim Angels.

Giants players were shocked about hearing the news, especially coming in the middle of an exciting World Series pitting two teams that have not won a championship in five decades, despite having smaller payrolls than some of the baseball juggernauts like the Yankees. 

"Wait, what?" San Francisco centerfielder Andres Torres was quoted as saying upon learning of the deal.

"Can they do that?" Giants manager Bruce Bochy asked. "I'm pretty sure they can't do that," he added.

The Giants projected OF for 2011; center field alley
and the bleacher crawl space are considered "in play."

Giants players were not the only ones shocked upon hearing the news. The Texas Rangers themselves had hopes of signing Wall to a deal in the off season, and many players expressed their dismay upon hearing the Yankees had beaten them to the punch, much as the Rangers had signed All-Star Cy Young winning pitcher Cliff Lee when the Yankees seemed all but certain to land him.

"Mother fucker!" Ian Kinsler exclaimed.

The move leaves the Giants scrambling in the off season to find a replacement. The team has stated it's short term plan is a series of lawn chairs, but until they are able to sign them, for now, any balls that roll under the superstructure of AT&T Park's centerfield bleachers will be considered in play.

The news reverberated through out the league. Longtime Chicago Cub Ivy Confines, hoping to end his long and fruitless association with the franchise, was unavailable for comment, but was reported by sources close to him as "inconsolable."